Monday, November 11, 2013

Warning: Insensitive people at the grocery store rant ahead!

                               By guest author Michaela Heilhecker

A few years ago I found myself sandwiched in line waiting to check out, this is not an odd occurrence. The woman in front of me had 5 children she was wrangling (which did not seem odd to me), as well as the fact that the children were a mix of Caucasian and Hispanic short people (again, hmph...didn't notice until it was pointed out to me). 

Yes, I said pointed out! The people behind me, as I controlled my own kids, began very loudly whispering things like: "How many baby daddies do you think she has?" "Can't even dress those kids for weather!" "Just wait until she whips out the food stamps." I contained my kids and my anger, and looked incredulously back at the well dressed, normal couple spouting such, well, total CRAP! 

 I looked forward to see a woman fumbling with separating clothes items; coats, shoes, socks, and underwear, from food items with the black plastic separators. There were five kids, two that shared her same blonde hair with jackets and warm shoes and three, beautifully dark haired, with deep brown eyes, sad eyes; wearing shorts and flip flops. Note that it's cold outside in Colorado at night in November! 

It was true she was struggling with a food stamp card and she didn't know what buttons to use to complete the transaction. As the class act behind me deeply sighed and said, "There's our tax dollars neatly at work!" I shot them what I can only imagine was the death glare only a mother can execute to perfection.

I stepped forward and kindly said, "Can I help? These things are confusing." She looked at me. I quietly asked, "Foster or Adopted? I have fostered several kiddos...two bio, two adopted, I get it, please let me help!" She smiled, embarrassed. "New Foster Mom, this is my first time using one of these, they came last night, gonna be with us for a while. They gave us food, but the kids needed clothes, but we haven't received the stipend and it will be another month before we see the 80 dollars for the year for each child."

I looked at the kids and smiled, and turned to her and said, "Beautiful children, I am glad you all have each other!" 

I showed her how to use the card as the Jackholes behind us snorted. I explained to her how she doesn't have to separate items and that the items get separated by the computer at check out and how she pays the balance after she runs her card. She handed each child their new coat, loaded up her cart as she left I side hugged her and told her, "You got this!" I then gave her my number in case she needed any further advice or help. 

After they were out of ear shot...I turned with tears to the smug well dressed man and woman behind me. "Those children? They lost the right to live with their parents just last night. Those clothes? Probably the only clothes they came with, own, or got to leave their home with. THAT woman? Opened her home to strange kids, kids that needed a safe place to go, when few would, when the home they lived in no longer proved safe enough or secure enough for them. The food stamps, something health and welfare helps an already mother of two feed three additional new mouths. There are not nearly enough woman or people like her in this world!" 

I whipped back around and started slamming my groceries on the belt, and then turned back around...Voice shaking; "AND even IF those kids were all hers, and she had a dozen baby daddies, and was on food stamps...NO CHILD in this great country or any other deserves to be cold or hungry, I am sorry, but your behavior? Poorly done, VERY Poorly done!" 

My new 'friends' left the checkout aisle and joined another...silently. I grabbed a bag of peanut M&M's for emotional support. As I finished checking out, the girl checking me out smiled and winked, "Single mom on WIC and food stamps, what you said...ROCKED!" 

 I grimaced and said, "Thanks, I wasn't sure I should have gone off like that...hug those babies of yours tonight, in their warm beds and with full bellies." I cried as I loaded my car and ate my favorite peanut M&M's. You foster or adoptive moms out there...hold your heads high, you are the hands and hearts that are the strong and the steady for small ones when they need it the most. Hats off and so much love to you!

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